Love Letters

For the past few months, I have become a fan of love letters.

It's simple really.  I write letters to my friends whenever they are going through a rough patch, or when they accomplish something that I think they should be proud of.  I write them hand written letters to know that someone cares enough to take a moment of their day to send well wishes there way.

If I could, I would write to every single person who has read this blog, or has sent a prayer or well wish throughout this whole journey to my family and I.

As I sit here thinking about the history of love letters, I long for the days where a guy would send a letter to his girl back at home to let her know how much he cared.  I wish for the day that you sent your girlfriends letters filled with adventures of those summer days that you met the guy of your dreams, or you were able to let your hair down and have fun.  Or the notes that were passed in secret during classes in middle school to your friends to pass the boring days.

Love letters.  They can really change a person's whole day.  Dare you to try it and not get a response that it brightened someone's day.

Life Lessons at 26

Two years ago; a snapshot of a wonderful accomplishment

Since today is my 26th birthday, I decided that I should write some lessons that life has taught me.  Enjoy.

1. Nothing is better then receiving a hand written letter in the mailbox from a friend.  I not only love sending them, but getting them makes my whole day.

2. You can judge how good a restaurant is by their nachos.  If you don't agree with me, then you obviously have never tested this.

3.  Hospital visits can be stressful, but it's always important to try and be kind to those who are taking care of you.  Health care providers aren't going to be so nice to you if you are being an asshole.

4. Capture as many of life moments with a camera.  Being able to look back on all those amazing memories is something I truly love more then words.

5. Travel.  I have been to many states throughout the country and it's been such a wonderful experience every where I have gone.  The getting their part may be hectic (hello getting stuck in airports...) but the fun times I have had during those trips are priceless.

6.  On-line shopping is one of the greatest inventions of all time, but it can also be the devil.  There have been so many times that I have bought new clothes without having to deal with rude people at malls or stores.

7. Music makes my world go round and song lyrics can truly speak to the soul.  If you don't believe that a great song can change your whole mood, then you haven't been exposed to great music.

8.  Enjoy food.  If my stomach problems have taught me anything, it's always enjoy every aspect of a meal.  Even though I know I may be in pain a hour after eating my meal, if it's a good dish, then I will enjoy it. No matter what.

9.  It's completely okay to spend the day in sweat pants, snuggled with blankets, on the couch reading a good book.  I do this on a regular basis and I'm totally okay with being a bum.

10.  I'm also okay with reading my favorite books on a regular basis.  If I absolutely love a book, then I'm excited to go back and see my favorite characters.  In fact, 90% of the books on my book case I have read more then once, and I'm not ashamed of that.

11.  Life seems to be better in the summer time, as well as by the beach.  I think the warm weather wards off the bad energy that winter sometimes provides.  Case in point, I have never had stomach problems during the summer.  And whenever I'm over thinking a problem, if I go to the beach, then I feel completely renewed.

12.  Life will set you up with many obstacles, including many different medical problems.  As long as you try to keep your head up, and surround yourself with a good support system, then you will be able to overcome anything.  Also, even if you think you can't give blood, it's possible.  It's also possible for the girl who used to cry during any sort of shot can look at blood being taken and also give herself her own shots.

13.  It's also possible that as you grow up, you also become more emotional.  It's also possible that those emotions come out more often when you don't feel well.  Also possible to want to cry at the drop of the hat whenever someone is nice to you.  It's fine to be emotional.  Embrace it.

14. Singing on the top of your lungs to your favorite song is acceptable.  While dancing around your room, and having the music blaring.  This dancing/singing combination will let your worries slide away from you.  Dare you to try it.

15. Never be afraid to tell people how much you care about them.  Give them hugs.  High fives when they achieve something good.  Smile at strangers who did something nice to you. Say I love you.  People want to be cared about.  And smiles and hugs can change the world.

These life lessons may be general ideas to some people, or not very profound, but the fact remains they are a few of the things I truly believe in.  I always knew I was lucky to have such amazing people in my life, but you really know how many people are in your corner when some obstacles come your way.  I want to thank everyone who reads this, who has believed in me, who has given me a hug or words of encouragement, not only in the past 2 years but especially the past 26 years of my life. It means more to me then I think you will ever understand to have you all in my corner.

Happy birthday to me! Here's to many more to come.

Smile Like You Mean It.

Today I'm rather terrified.

I have a doctor's appointment in about forty minutes to learn how to inject myself with my new medications.  I'm 25 years old, am perfectly okay with other people poking me with needles, but the thought of doing it myself?  Makes me want to cry.

So I've been trying to put on a brave face, and not really think about the fact that I have to inject myself with this wonderful little pen needle for the long run.  From what I have read on-line, it hurts like a bitch if you do it in your thigh.  Research on message boards scares and reassures me at the same time because people aren't going to lie about different medications when it comes to colitis talk.

I'm just hoping that this new medication will work. And not be painful.  Because I'm a big baby and just can't deal with being in pain anymore.  

This is a difficult week for some of the closest people in my life and my heart aches that they have to go through any pain in their life. I have been blessed with a beautiful family.  But I'm also extremely lucky to have another family, a family that may not be related by blood, but has become my family.  They are some of the strongest people I know, and I'm proud of everything they do.  This second family of mine changes my life whenever we all get together, and I wouldn't have it any other way.  I have watched my younger sisters and brothers grow into beautifully strong young adults and I couldn't be more proud.  And I know that there are people up in heaven who are smiling at us all, so proud of every accomplishment we have made, helping to wipe every tear we shed, and taking our side when the journey becomes a little too difficult.

While this may not be the most uplifting post to begin a Monday morning, I leave you with words from the Beatles.  Whisper words of wisdom, let it be....

I Feel So Close to You Right Now

Two days at work down. Two more to end the week to go.

While some might not agree with me getting back to work, it's good for my soul.  Everyone at work is so understanding for everything I have been going through, and they are all so helpful.  I have a system now.  I sit on a chair and type up prescriptions with my leg sitting on top of one of the recycling bins under the desk/table/counter thing.  I don't really move from there, instead ask for help from my coworkers when I need to check if we have something, or have to give the script to the pharmacist.  

Tenzin and Holly check up on me on a regular basis; actually everyone does.  I have people making sure I'm doing well throughout the day, and people who look at me like I'm crazy when I want to get up and do something like walk to the other side of the pharmacy.

I won't lie to you; after a day at the "office" I feel completely drained.  It's tiring sitting on a chair all day just punching in data.  I have turned to Tenzin multiple times and said how I'm ready to fall asleep throughout the day.  But it's soooo much better then sitting in my bed feeling sorry for myself.

Today was a day off and I didn't really do much other then listen to Taylor's new CD and fall in love with it.  Even though she gets a lot of backlash for constantly writing about her failed relationships, I love how she somehow puts my feelings in words with her songs.  Seriously, it's sometimes really creepy.

Tonight is the LAST night of those devil shots.  Or at least I'm crossing my fingers and toes that it is because my stomach is starting to look like a smiley face with the little bruises.