An Angel Got His Wings....

Yesterday the world lost another amazing guy to leukemia.

I've been numb since I read the text messages this morning.  It's silly because I have only hung out with Christian a handful of times, and yet I burst into tears multiple times today.

Sometimes I just don't get it.  Why are there so many amazing people who are taken away from us and yet people who don't exude happiness and all that jazz are still around.  He was amazing.  He always smiled.  Always.  In the handful of times I have hung out with him, he just shined.  You wanted to be around him.  And from what I have seen on his facebook and the group about him, everyone else believes that as well.

If I am busy, then I don't think about it.  If I sit around, I can't deal with it.  I said multiple times today that it was one of those days that I needed to just stay in bed and sleep all day.  

And I'm absolutely terrified to go say goodbye to him.  I regret so much not going to see him a few weeks ago.  And now I have to go say a final goodbye.

Christian, you were an amazing guy....seriously one of the few honestly good guys.  And I am so blessed to have gotten to know you.  Even for a little time.  I hope you finally find peace from this difficult battle in your life.  You will be truly missed and have inspired so many people around you.

Why Does Bad Things Happen to Good People?

In stopping by this page, I'm hoping I can get your help.  If you remember, a few months ago, I asked for a favor to put my friend Christian in your prayers.  That wonderful guy who had to start a fight for his life in his mid twenties?  Yes, that amazing guy.

Well from what I understand Christian hasn't been doing so well.  He ended up in Smillow for a few weeks and now he is back home, but we don't know much.   And what sucks is that he is this honestly good guy who does not deserve to be dealing with this crap at his age.  His family does not deserve to go through this.  And he doesn't realize, or maybe he does, how many people actually back him and want him to get better.

I think it's a testament to a person's character by the amount of people that come to support you when you are going through a difficult time.  I know I have seen those types of people when I dealt with my crap last year.  Christian didn't hang out with us a lot, and hadn't hung out with us in a while, and yet here we all are, gathering together to send him prayers and well wishes so he has a speedy recovery.

I don't wish bad things on my worse enemy.  And I especially never wished this to happen to one of the good people in life.  I don't think a lot of people read this anymore, but I am hoping that whoever does will send all the love and support to this great guy when he needs it.  I want to go on adventures with Christian someday; I think all my friends would have fun to go on adventures with him.  But he needs to get better, and he needs our prayers to do so.  

Christian, I hope you know how much we all support you, and want you to get better.  So keep fighting, okay?  Because life just needs to show us that it isn't unfair all the time.

My name is Jen and I'm a worrier.

Hiiiiiii Jen.

Considering the past year plus I have gone through, it's understandable that I worry about things in regards to my health.  But I have always worried.  I worry about my future and if I will find a job I love.  I worry about my family.  I worry about moving out of my house or eventually getting married.  But most recently, I have been worrying about my health.

My stomach or insides have not been okay for the past two weeks.  It's gotten to a point where I have to sometimes run out of work to get to a bathroom, even though nothing happens when I get in there.  I have been drinking waters like it's my job but I still am so freaking thirsty.  It all just does not make any sense, right? Right.

On top of that, I woke up a few days ago with a horrible Charlie horse in the Henry side of my leg.  No big deal right?  Well that Charlie horse hasn't gone away and I've been limping on it whenever I have been walking.  At work I don't notice it because I have been so busy, but when I'm home and not doing anything, it hurts. 

And I worry, that all of my health problems will never go away.